Favourite Post from the old blog...the post NOT about meeting Nelson Mendela but instead a post about Richard Madeley aka dishy dicky and much more!

Firstly, anyone else hear that Conrad Black is headed to prison?? I know him, in fact one of my earliest memories involves him. Still not sure what I think about this, may do a post another day!

Thought I'd re-post my favourite blog post from the big old blog. It's funny, I had at least 450 readers a day, 45-70 comments on each post and yet I felt my literary juices were stifled, here now, a fortnight into a small blog and I'm loving every moment!

What a day.... I was going to write this great post tonight about meeting Nelson Mandela....but I am too tired to do anything but debrief by sharing my day....
8:15 - leave house for hair appointment, happen to look at gas meter....empty (totally) swing by the gas station and pay £40/$70US for gas for my small small car....yup it is that expensive here in blighty
9:00 - park at my work parking lot - woo hoo my space is still there. Don't have to pay (the building allows shoppers to park there, but they have to pay a donation to a charity, workers do not) but I want to, can't find any change, promise I'll come back with money even though they tell me I don't have to
9:15 - Arrive 15 minutes late at my hair appointment - stylist not happy.....
9:16 - Remember why I don't like going to the hair dresser - the combination of mirrors and the chair make anyone who isn't a size 0 look like they just swallowed a dump truck! I swear I look wider and wider with each passing minute.....wish I looked gracefully curvy like Judy Finnegan (mind you if dishy Dicky were my husband I'd make an effort too!!)
9:17 - realize that Miss size 0 stylist could fit 2 of her bodies into mine...
9:18 - REALLY WANT TO GET OUT OF HERE....Stylist tells me, well it will only be about 2 hours.......GULP - decide best option is to keep eyes closed, first remind stylist 'I am NOT brave, please tread lightly and whatever you do don't make me any blonder!!!!!!'
9:19 - realize I will never really be able to keep my eyes closed...decide to read a gossip mag...
9:20 - officially bored....realize I still look double the size of the size 0 stylist and decided to close my eyes....
9:22 - open eyes to check watch (surely 30 minutes must have passed....?) 2 minutes later....
10:15 - colour ready, time for wash!
10:16 -Size 0 two is my 'washer' she is a very very good washer, how I wish she was a man!
10:20 - In chair now the cutting has begun....decide seriously the only option is to close eyes......and pray
11:00 - eyes open...it's not too bad.....yes, not bad!
11:05 - go to pay, hand in $100 certificate....
11:06 - 'I'm sorry miss but we can't register your gift card, it wasn't activated'......what to do?11:07 - They go and get manager
11:08 - Size 0 three gets involved as well as super uper 'I am batting for the other team' male stylist...(honestly he gives Alan Carr a run for his money)
11:09- they accept it and will call me if the gift card says it doesn't have £100 and I can pay the difference....I pay what they think I owe and leave
11:15 - Arrive at shop to pick up some things I had ordered for some friends,
11:20 -wait in LONG line up
11:32 - woman tells me that the books aren't on the buy one get one half price deal, I tell her they are in the section that says that....she calls manager
11:40 - he FINALLY arrives - makes me walk him there, I show him 'Oh yes he said it is buy one get one half price'
11:41 - arrive back at my space to see it is gone, woman clerk tells customers she has to serve me first, they simply will not move, I end up passing my money over their heads!!!
11:45 - Feeling really smug....nice hair, nice gifts, on my way to car park (with change for the charity) to get my car and go for my stone treatment....oh no....I see the hot man who told me on the date he sees dead people - hide behind bush.....
11:47 - Safe, start walking, hear phone ringing...pick it up, start chatting tell friend I am in a rush, will call later.....hang up to find someone tapping shoulder....
11:48 - turn around (thinking it couldn't be could it???) IT's HIM
11:49 - exchange pleasantries, 'wow you look good' (him) 'thanks' (me)......
11:50 - oh no I can tell by the 'I'm holding it in look'.......he's going to AAAAAHHHHH
11:51 - he asks me out again
11:52 - me squirming as he is speaking I am thinking remember honesty is the best policy decide i can't be that mean.....tell him that I have met someone....
11:53 -Oh, is it serious?' says he...."well we are engaged and expecting our second baby together and plan to move to Borneo to take a very early retirement" I tell him.....
11:54 - Shaking his head, he says "wow you guys move fast, wasn't our date only a few months ago"
11:55 - Me: "well I have to be at an appointment in 5 minutes" he then says "I am planning a trip next year, maybe I could visit you"
11:56 - Me "Um we are going to be missionaries in Bornio, not sure if your faith would fit in...."
11:57 - "Too bad" says he "I guess I won't be seeing you at the bi-monthly strategy meetings for much longer"....(DO'H!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
11:58 - I now have 2 minutes to get to hot stone treatment that is a 5 minute drive....pray to God for forgiveness for lying - lying = sin
11:59 - arrive at car, give charity money.....
12:06 - arrive at parking lot for hot stone treatment, need change to pay....oops gave it all to the charity.....
12:08 - me in total panic, must have looked quite damsel in distress nice man comes over and gives me the money - thank him profusely
12:09 - walk all the way down the hill, pay12:10 - walk up the hill
12:14 - Arrive at appointment
12:15 - 1:45 - this time would be best described as total bliss - hot stone treatment and pedicure 1:45 - go to pay....they don't take cards (WHAT????) am directed to an ATM/hole in the wall
1:47 -arrive at ATM/hole in the wall to find the following message 'We are sorry to inform you that this machine can not be of assistance at this time'
1:50 - arrive at shop, ask if they can do cash back yes, if you spend £2.50
1:55- finally get to front of line, purchase 5 packs of gum/mints,comes to £2.49, clerk tells me I must purchase another one
1:59 - back to shop, pay
2:00- walk down hill to car, realize my feet hurt, remember I just got a pedicure and her last words were 'rest your feet'
2:03 - hobble down hill, get in car
2:15 - arrive at appointment that was supposed to start at 2, once again....'I HAVE NO CHANGE FOR THE PARKING LOT' -
2:16 - decide only option is to rummage through car
2:18....find enough for 1 hour.....praying it's enough
2:20 - arrive at appointment, apologize profusely!!
2:21 - realize I haven't had any food or drinks since 8am.....choice to be made accept water from lady & use public loos (one day I'll bore you all with a post about my HATE for public loos) or go without....
2:21 - decide to go without
2:22 - the smells in this place are making me SICK
2:23 - am turning green with sickness from the fumes
2:24 - I ask the lady how she can stand the fumes...her answer 'I don't smell them anymore' I then say "from a public health perspective I'd be very worried about that"
2:25 - she looks blankly at me
2:26 - 3:19 - cough, wheeze, feel dizzy, feel like being sick, think about how much my feet hurt.... 3:20 - pay and get the hell out of there
3:30 - drive back into the city for appointment at the bank
3:45 - Arrive in the city, pay at meter....WHAT WAS I MISSING??? CHANGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
3:46 - Seriously feel like giving up and going home, but must pay school fees....realize my feet are still seriously hurting, take shoes off, nice man comes out of his office
3:47 - Nice man insists on paying my parking fee, I promise I'll be back with money in a couple hours, he insists it isn't necessary....I insist!
3:50 - walk by a dear homeless man I always talk to and purchase BIG ISSUE from, he says 'hey lady' and smiles, I greet him, we chat
3:51 - I go to store and buy him sandwich and get some money for him
3:52 - give him some money, he then wants to hug, then I hand him his sandwich (he likes meat, so I always get him free range, organic ham sandwich, some fruit and juice)
3:53 - he begins the line he always says 'hey lady, do you think someone like me needs organic food' , to which I always say 'but I care what goes into your body, and how could I live with myself if I fed you something with toxins or something that was made by keeping animals in terrible conditions.
3:54 - he laughs, tears streaming down his face and says 'thanks crazy lady' and then mutters 'I love you'
3:58 - arrive at my bank appointment (wobbling all the way), I get in before the door is locked
4:00 - see all my money go out of my account.....
4:03 - leave bank, wobble to the post office
4:08 - 4:15 - wait in line...feet hurt, look down and see the polish on my toes has already smugged....
4:17 - wobble to counter....
4:30 - I have the jeopardy theme going through my head, mr post man is very very slow.....
4:40 - wobble to shop and buy some swimming trunks for baby bean....
4:45 - as I am paying run into a Canadian friend who lives here with her daughter from China, greet, tell news etc
4:55 - walk out of shop, promising I'll call soon to meet up, see a homeless man selling his BIG ISSUE magazine (a magazine homeless people can sell, they get to keep 1/2 of the cost of each magazine) decide to buy the magazine.
4:56 - He is so happy I am buying it, I look in my wallet and what do I see??? NO CHANGE
4:58 - I then give mr magazine man a bill to take to a shop to get change
4:59 - He stands there with a puzzled look 'you trust me??????'
5:00 - Me OF COURSE!!!
5:02 - He realizes he has stood there for 2 whole minutes in awe that I trust him, then runs off
5:05 - He arrives back with the change
5:06 - we chat
5:07 - He thanks me for being the first customer of the day (he started selling at 9am) and for trusting him....
5:15 - hobble to my favourite Malaysian food store to get some dinner....
5:16 - 5:19 - purchase food, realize my car parking is almost up
5:25 - arrive at car, go and pay man (who still insists I don't need to), get in car
5:45 - almost home, get a phone call, 'can I pick up some cheesecake for my mum'
5:53 - arrive at grocery store, find cheesecake, remember the older lady who lives alone a street below me told me she is always running out of milk, decide to go get her some ,
5:54 - reach for milk.....get it, an older lady looks at me and says 'is that the last organic milk'
5:55 - give the lady the milk, go and find someone to look in the back for more organic milk
5:57 - find someone, he goes off to find it
5:57 - 6:05 - playing Jeopardy song in my head.......
6:06 - he brings it
6:10 - pay
6:18 - arrive at older lady's house....she looks at it and says 'Ooohh thank you, but I don't drink organic milk'
6:19 - I decide to forgo the talk about the importance of organics and tell her to try it and she'll be surprised,
6:20 - she then says 'just a minute, I'll try it'
6:22 - she drinks milk and says 'oh dear, this is lovely'
6:27 - I arrive home happy but tired....my hair is now quickly going back into ringlets instead of the straight locks it was when I left the salon...but in general I am happy (happy but with bleeding feet)
The motto of the story really is make sure you have ooodles of change

In hindsight it may have been quicker to write about meeting Nelson Mandela